So my second son's first birthday party is this Saturday and it was my goal to nurse for the first year. I can't believe how fast this year went. With my first son it felt like it took 3 years to get to his first birthday and now with my little baby Jonathan it feels like just a few months ago he was born. As you can read on my post "Nursing Strike" I didn't have a choice as to whether or not I should continue nursing my first born, Ben, after the one year mark because he weaned himself at just over 11 months. I think a few family members were hoping Jonathan would quit nursing on his own, but he's still going strong - almost nursing as often as a newborn! The good news is that in the past couple weeks he started drinking water from a bottle and now is exploring the concept of a sippie cup with a straw, but with the recent discoveries of cow milk protein intolerances in my family I'm scared to stop nursing Jonathan. What if my sweet, NON COLICKY, HAPPY little Jonathan turns into a screaming, suffering in pain child with stomach cramping, vomiting and diarrhea issues leaving us both wanting to die?
What are the alternatives to cow milk for a one year old, you ask? Soy milk - which they are beginning to discover isn't so great for you, especially for boys because of the estrogen levels, Rice Milk - which has no protein and very little fat, Almond or Coconut milk - both of which also have little to no protein and fat and may cause nut allergies. Toddlers NEED whole milk, it's suppose to be whole milk from their mother (you know of the same species / animal breed as they are) but there's a reason why the World Health Organization and the American Academy of Pediatrics both recommend breastfeeding until age 2. So why wouldn't I nurse until age two? There are plenty of benefits to keep breastfeeding: It doesn't hurt (it stopped hurting after the first week), it's free, it's always ready / available, will never spoil / expire / be recalled, etc. I don't really have too many concerns with continuing to breastfeed. I don't really have too many concerns with continuing to breastfeed but here are a few: Most people, including close family and friends don't get it. It's very uncommon in our society to even nurse for the first year so going beyond that really rubs people the wrong way, even loved ones who know how passionate I am about breastfeeding! Second, I am a little nervous about all those teeth! Jonathan now has 6 teeth and although he has yet to bite me, I actually received an email from a reader that covers this exact fear of mine, and I will share that story (and picture) in my next post. The only other concern I have is how I'm going to feel lifting my 12, 16, or 20 month old up on my lap to nurse him, especially if I have to do it in front of anyone. Also, if Jonathan starts to become aware and reach / try to nurse in public or actually starts verbalizing that he wants "momma's milk" that's going to be embarrassing. So I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to nurse Jonathan until he's two, but I'm going to try...here's to all the mom's who nurse beyond the first year!
If you are thinking about nursing beyond the first year and want to know you're not the only one, there are actually a surprisingly high number of blogs out there of women who have talked about their experience. Here was one I really liked:
http://happyhealthymama.com/2010/11/my-breastfeeding-story-part-one-the-beginning.html
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Friday, June 3, 2011
My sister blog!
My dear readers,
I know I've been neglecting you and this blog, but I have good reason. I've hinted on other posts in the past that I've been trying to balance some family struggles. Now I'm ready to share. A few months ago my husband and I became concerned that our first born son, Ben, might be Autistic, or at least heading down that path. I've devoted as much time as I could spare away from my family responsibilities and blogging to concentrate on what I could / need to do to help my child. As I began to understand more and more about this epidemic, I realized that I need to use what I've learned to help others who are either suffering down the same path as my family or for those new pregnant mommies and families who might be affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder in the future. I present you with my sister blog Take Better Care which will cover everything we've been through, everything we're going through, and everything I've learned along the way. Please be patient with me as I try to find time to juggle both blogs on top of everything else. Thank you for your support and understanding.
Take better care,
Pokey Momma
I know I've been neglecting you and this blog, but I have good reason. I've hinted on other posts in the past that I've been trying to balance some family struggles. Now I'm ready to share. A few months ago my husband and I became concerned that our first born son, Ben, might be Autistic, or at least heading down that path. I've devoted as much time as I could spare away from my family responsibilities and blogging to concentrate on what I could / need to do to help my child. As I began to understand more and more about this epidemic, I realized that I need to use what I've learned to help others who are either suffering down the same path as my family or for those new pregnant mommies and families who might be affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder in the future. I present you with my sister blog Take Better Care which will cover everything we've been through, everything we're going through, and everything I've learned along the way. Please be patient with me as I try to find time to juggle both blogs on top of everything else. Thank you for your support and understanding.
Take better care,
Pokey Momma
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
If you just couldn't make milk
This post is for those who just couldn't make milk.
I realize that this is a pro-breastfeeding blog, and that some of you tried, and wanted very badly to breastfeed, but just weren't able to. In previous posts, I talk about how in order to have the best chances of breastfeeding we need to have knowledge and the right support from family and be as prepared as possible by purchasing helpful supplies like pumps, nursing pillows, creams, bras, etc. All of these things will increase your chances on having a successful nursing relationship, but what happens when you have all these things and still can't do it?
There's a term I've come across in my research known as "Failure to Lactate" or "Lactation Failure" which I cannot stand, because once again it creates this idea that if you can't lactate you've somehow failed. This is just one more additional source of guilt or frustration or anger or any other negative association that gets attached to breastfeeding or the inability to breastfeed in general. What this term actually means is that for reasons unknown (could be genetic or physical) a woman cannot produce enough milk to provide the nurishment for her child.
There are tons of resources on line that go over How to Overcome Lactation Failure and they might be helpful for those who are still trying to nurse but aren't making enough milk or are having latching difficulties or some of the other common breastfeeding challenges, but then there are some women who come to a point where they have to accept that they are not going to be able to breastfeed. And this is where I like to focus on one tip: Redefine Success. A woman decides before her baby comes that she wants to breastfeed instead of formula feed, but a sense of failure seems to settle in as soon as she has to feed her baby with anything other than breastmilk. I know this scenario all too well. I experienced it with my first son and even broke down and purchased a jug of premade formula for my second during times when I just thought I couldn't do it anymore or that my baby would be better off on fomrula. I've spent countless hours talking with a few friends who could not breastfeed and continue to torment themselves with guilt. I recently spoke with a friend who was frustrated because she tried to breastfeed, and pumped as much as she could, but wasn't able to make more than a quarter of an ounce from only one breast. At some point, she had to accept that her baby clearly needs more than that and she would have to use formula. For some women, breastfeeding isn't an option, even if they really wanted to breastfeed.
This is where I'd like to invite any woman who wasn't able to breastfeed, for as long as they had hoped, to redefine success. At the start of this post I said that using all of the support and knowledge possible will increase your chances of having a "successful" nursing relationship. I didn't qualify how long that relationship had to last for or whether or not breastmilk exclusively made up the baby's diet. For some, successful might have to be that a mother tried her best, used all the resources she had, and gave her baby as much as she could. For others, it might be that they could never establish a healthy latch and their baby received breastmilk from a bottle, and formula may or may not have to be added to that baby's diet. Whatever the story, view it as success. You did your best for your baby and by my standards that equals success!
For the mothers who tried but weren't able to breastfeed, or produce as much as they wanted to, give yourself a pat on the back for at least trying and take comfort in knowing that your baby has a mother who was willing to try and did the very best she could with what she had at that time.
"Most" of the literature out there will tell you that every mother can breastfeed and that almost every breastfeeding challenge can be overcome with the proper attention and care, and these things may very well be true - for the "most" part. I have dug a little deeper in wanting to understand why some women were not able to breastfeed and I have found numerous blogs and websites where women have come together to share their stories on how they tried every tea, beer and supplement, how they pumped until they bled and cried, and although they should have been able to produce milk, they simply couldn't. As a mother it is so easy to blame ourselves, to focus on how we could have done better, but sometimes we also have to look at what we have done and accept that we are all doing the best we can and that's the best thing for our babies!
I realize that this is a pro-breastfeeding blog, and that some of you tried, and wanted very badly to breastfeed, but just weren't able to. In previous posts, I talk about how in order to have the best chances of breastfeeding we need to have knowledge and the right support from family and be as prepared as possible by purchasing helpful supplies like pumps, nursing pillows, creams, bras, etc. All of these things will increase your chances on having a successful nursing relationship, but what happens when you have all these things and still can't do it?
There's a term I've come across in my research known as "Failure to Lactate" or "Lactation Failure" which I cannot stand, because once again it creates this idea that if you can't lactate you've somehow failed. This is just one more additional source of guilt or frustration or anger or any other negative association that gets attached to breastfeeding or the inability to breastfeed in general. What this term actually means is that for reasons unknown (could be genetic or physical) a woman cannot produce enough milk to provide the nurishment for her child.
There are tons of resources on line that go over How to Overcome Lactation Failure and they might be helpful for those who are still trying to nurse but aren't making enough milk or are having latching difficulties or some of the other common breastfeeding challenges, but then there are some women who come to a point where they have to accept that they are not going to be able to breastfeed. And this is where I like to focus on one tip: Redefine Success. A woman decides before her baby comes that she wants to breastfeed instead of formula feed, but a sense of failure seems to settle in as soon as she has to feed her baby with anything other than breastmilk. I know this scenario all too well. I experienced it with my first son and even broke down and purchased a jug of premade formula for my second during times when I just thought I couldn't do it anymore or that my baby would be better off on fomrula. I've spent countless hours talking with a few friends who could not breastfeed and continue to torment themselves with guilt. I recently spoke with a friend who was frustrated because she tried to breastfeed, and pumped as much as she could, but wasn't able to make more than a quarter of an ounce from only one breast. At some point, she had to accept that her baby clearly needs more than that and she would have to use formula. For some women, breastfeeding isn't an option, even if they really wanted to breastfeed.
This is where I'd like to invite any woman who wasn't able to breastfeed, for as long as they had hoped, to redefine success. At the start of this post I said that using all of the support and knowledge possible will increase your chances of having a "successful" nursing relationship. I didn't qualify how long that relationship had to last for or whether or not breastmilk exclusively made up the baby's diet. For some, successful might have to be that a mother tried her best, used all the resources she had, and gave her baby as much as she could. For others, it might be that they could never establish a healthy latch and their baby received breastmilk from a bottle, and formula may or may not have to be added to that baby's diet. Whatever the story, view it as success. You did your best for your baby and by my standards that equals success!
For the mothers who tried but weren't able to breastfeed, or produce as much as they wanted to, give yourself a pat on the back for at least trying and take comfort in knowing that your baby has a mother who was willing to try and did the very best she could with what she had at that time.
"Most" of the literature out there will tell you that every mother can breastfeed and that almost every breastfeeding challenge can be overcome with the proper attention and care, and these things may very well be true - for the "most" part. I have dug a little deeper in wanting to understand why some women were not able to breastfeed and I have found numerous blogs and websites where women have come together to share their stories on how they tried every tea, beer and supplement, how they pumped until they bled and cried, and although they should have been able to produce milk, they simply couldn't. As a mother it is so easy to blame ourselves, to focus on how we could have done better, but sometimes we also have to look at what we have done and accept that we are all doing the best we can and that's the best thing for our babies!
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